The Lost Art of Being Bored | Why Kids Need Imagination

Maggie (00:02.402)
We are the first generation of mothers expected to raise peaceful children, while every screen in the room is designed to make them restless, impatient, and addicted. Welcome to Women Folk Revival, where we are deeply rooted and wildly intentional. I'm Maggie.

Meara (00:24.819)
Mira. And you know, I've been I've been thinking about this. I think we're the first generation in history that ever had to be bored, you know, and I don't know if that's if that's a good thing because when we were kids boredom was normal. You sat in the car, you looked out the window when you were going on vacation. Excuse me, you know, you played outside, went in the backyard,

Maggie (00:41.623)
Mm-hmm.

Meara (00:49.953)
made up all kinds of random games that I think I made a few up when we were in kindergarten and I remember to this day there was those sewer drains in the back of our school and I used to make up that game called Pizza where you had to jump on the sewer drains because those were like pepperoni circles. And like I would come up with all kinds of random things. You know you just figure things out but but now the second children are bored

Maggie (01:01.368)
Mm-hmm.

Maggie (01:12.034)
Mm-hmm. You do.

Meara (01:17.675)
Or say, Hey mom, I'm bored. There's that screen just right there ready to entertain them and honestly, I don't think it's just affecting the kids. You know, I I I think it's affecting us too.

Maggie (01:29.056)
It's affecting us too because we are having to compensate that for our children. You know? Whereas I can remember there there were times when I was growing up where I would get bored and I would I mean there were moments when I would struggle to figure something out. and you know, I I can remember talking to my mom, but it wasn't like it wasn't a problem that she had to fix.

Or like something that she had to teach me. I knew how to use my imagination. In fact, I had quite an overactive imagination. So much so that, you know, she was concerned and had to talk to my doctor about it. So that was n that was not something that I had to learn. But every once in a while, you know, I I would kind of be stumped on, hmm, like, you know, what should I do? But it

It wasn't like it is today where they're just totally lost. You know, and luckily my kids are I would say they're probably above average on being able to come up with something, especially lately. The three of them working together, they are playing so much that even when they do have their screens, even when the TV is on.

Meara (02:30.43)
Mm-hmm. They are.

Maggie (02:54.401)
they're they're ignoring it to to play and to do other things. so I'm grate very grateful for that because I do think that we did implement tablets and TV way too early.

Meara (02:55.498)
Paying attention. Yeah.

Meara (03:00.439)
Yeah.

Meara (03:11.862)
Mm.

Maggie (03:12.237)
and I think that's just because, you know, we are also adamant about them being outside and not, you know, just totally unaware of their surroundings when they do have electronics.

Meara (03:27.628)
Especially in the summertime when well, not this week. It's well, for us we've been outside this week, but it's just scorching hot. But like in the winter, you know, then you have to figure out what to do. But I know we touched a little bit last a little bit about this on last week's episode, but I felt like it was something we just kinda had to come back and revisit.

Maggie (03:35.287)
So hard.

Maggie (03:41.485)
Mm-hmm.

Meara (03:46.497)
It's I feel like it's important to discuss, you know. our kids, they had dis devices as we said as I said last in last week's episode, but not anymore. They don't have devices. We do still have TV. and that just seems more and more unusual every year. Anytime I go somewhere and people are like, your kids have this and like, you know, the latest phone or whatever and I'm like, My kids don't they don't have social media, they don't have any of those things.

Maggie (04:11.277)
Mm.

Meara (04:13.6)
You know, but everywhere I go I notice everyone's looking down at restaurants, at the park, at family gatherings, you know, everyone it's like everyone's together, but they're not really together. and I just

Maggie (04:18.323)
Everyone is looking down.

Maggie (04:23.105)
Yeah.

Maggie (04:28.725)
And it's and it's dangerous. It's so dangerous. And I see women doing it all the time. And women especially, we have to be alert because we're always a target because men are physically stronger. We're always a target. Children are targets. They need to be aware. We've I mean for for years and years and years, children get abducted.

Meara (04:31.626)
It's what? it's dangerous, yeah. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm.

Maggie (04:56.481)
This is a this is not a new thing, and it's becoming even more and more common. They have to be aware. Women have to be aware. And even men have to be aware. We were, I don't know, driving to the zoo or something, and we see this guy walking down the street and he's looking at his phone. And then there's a man that's walking towards him. And obviously you can tell this man is not in his right state of mind. Like he's, you know, mentally.

Meara (05:03.062)
Normal. Yeah.

Maggie (05:26.259)
Something is wrong with this man. And he looks mean and agitated. And we're like, dude, you've gotta look up because this guy's gonna attack you or something. He didn't attack him, but it that's what it looked like, and it very well could have happened. And especially walking on a busy road, you know, with people being on their phones in the car. You could very well get hit by a car with, you know, not paying attention. It's scary.

Meara (05:26.444)
Somewhere else. Okay.

Meara (05:41.6)
Yeah.

Meara (05:49.45)
yeah.

I've been guilty of that. It is very scary. And I keep wondering what we're losing because of this, you know. I do wanna add that even if you aren't on your phone, just think of how scary it is just constantly looking down because I'm gonna bring up a a time where it was about seven years ago, I was in Bahrain with my husband and our

two elders at the time were really little and we were walking in the mall and I was holding their hands and this really nice lady, she was in Burka, she was completely covered. She you couldn't tell her facial expressions or anything, but she came over and you know how you could tell when people smile how their eyes kinda go up. So I thought she was smiling, she waved, but then she went to reach for our daughter's hand and she was walking in the opposite direction. And I'm like, wait, what? And I like took her back real quick.

And my husband's like, we gotta get out of here. So it can happen anywhere. It can happen even if you are paying attention. It was so strange. And that is the safest country. I I feel so safe there. You know, they're not allowed to have guns or anything like that. And I mean there's what, that they don't have guns? Nobody does. Except for the you know, except for except for the police on that. But I've I've

Maggie (06:48.213)
You haven't anywhere.

Maggie (06:59.713)
That makes me feel unsafe. huh.

Meara (07:08.948)
in general that it's very safe country, but it can happen anywhere and even if you are paying attention. So it's very scary. And the one thing I've noticed about screens is it doesn't just take up time. They replace things. They replace the most important thing to me, which is conversation and eye contact, you know? yeah, yeah. And quiet moments and those matter more than we realize.

Maggie (07:13.183)
It can happen anywhere.

Maggie (07:28.857)
Yes. Connection, yeah.

Maggie (07:35.958)
And we've and we've discussed before that connection, human connection is so important for your health, everyone's health. And we're robbing that from our children at a young age when, you know, we're not we're not connected with them. I I know recently I have and my husband talked talked to me about it and I was like, wow, I didn't even realize

Meara (07:47.808)
Yeah. You can't.

Meara (07:56.161)
Yeah.

Maggie (08:05.495)
But I was I was you know, I'm with my children all day long and you know, we're trying to do the podcast and and some other things and we're renovating our house and we have two acres of wild land, which we love it being wild, but it does have to be contained in in ways and managed, tended to.

And I was caught up in all that stuff that I wasn't really fully connecting with my children. I didn't have that special time with them. now luckily when

when I when they were born, you know, I practiced attachment parenting and, you know, I I nursed for two to three Edgar was three and a half years. so we had a lot of that. So that was naturally instilled with them. So this little moment in time where I got completely

you know, taken away from it and thank goodness my husband was brave enough to say something. He could have said it nicer, but it's okay. I'm thankful that he did because that's not who I want to be. And I think it's so easy, especially for us mothers, that we get we get caught up in that stuff and we don't you know, even though I'm I'm essentially interacting with my kids every day, it's not real genuine connection that we were having.

Meara (09:08.16)
Ha ha ha.

Maggie (09:29.397)
And I couldn't believe that I that I had gotten to that point. But it can happen, no matter how intentional you are, it can happen.

Meara (09:29.943)
Yeah.

Meara (09:38.099)
Mm. I've been trying to become more conscious of being in that moment with my kids because there's so many of them and they're, you know, all coming at me at once sometime most of the time. So,

Maggie (09:49.845)
Mm.

Meara (09:52.503)
You know, it's a learn in progress. I'm I still have to feel like, okay, it's too much, you guys have to, you know, back off a little bit. But they just they just need that attention. Like you said, I nursed as well all my children, not as not as long, about two years, and we still co sleep with our youngest and then the other two are still in our room.

Maggie (10:10.827)
Mm-hmm.

Meara (10:14.87)
We think it's time for them to kinda get their own space. But we just we wanted them near us for that connection. Even though we're sleeping, it's still that sense of security for them and for us. So

Maggie (10:26.653)
Mm hmm. For yeah, for for me too. I I sleep better when my children are with me because I know I know that they're safe, I know that they're fine and everything's okay. And when they're not with me, I I constantly worry. I I hear a noise and I'm like, my goodness, is that you know it's and we are

They they share a bedroom right now and I actually my husband was out of town so I built this huge fort in my kids' room and they've been they've been sleeping together and they're more together than they normally would be. and they're cozy and they're happy and I I like that better. To have my children in individual rooms and separated. Man, that just gives me anxiety thinking about it.

Meara (11:22.338)
It's funny you mentioned forts because on my nights off when I'm home, my kids wanna build forts and my two older kids wanna build forts and then they ha let the two younger ones. The youngest is still with us in our room, but like our two young other younger ones will go and sleep in their room with them in the fort. And tonight I was gonna let them build the big one in here in the in the school bedroom so that they can all just be together and maybe watch a movie. So yeah. Forts are fun.

Maggie (11:23.552)
Yeah.

Maggie (11:49.355)
Yeah. They're so fun. You know, and it just I think it creates a little cozy protective area, yeah, where it can be o you know, just a tiny little world for them and

Meara (12:03.393)
Yeah.

Maggie (12:04.48)
And my kids build forts all the time and they're constantly doing it in the living room and they bring all their stuffies out, all their blankets, all their toys. And I'm just thinking to myself, I'm like, Hey, let's do this in your bedroom. It can stay up for, you know, for for a while until I have to, you know, like vacuum and and dust.

Meara (12:08.943)
yeah. Dining room table.

Meara (12:17.046)
Yeah.

Meara (12:22.167)
Yeah.

Maggie (12:25.536)
But I'm like, it can it can be days, you know, it can that it can be out here. It's like if you if we build one out here in the living room, it's it's coming down tonight or tomorrow, you know, it's just the way it is.

Meara (12:25.632)
Make dinner.

Yeah.

Meara (12:37.226)
Or as I build it, my kids like to build forts at the dining room table and then they put their heavy metal water bottles on top of the blankets and I'm like, This is not gonna work and then you hear water bottles clanking all over the place. I'm like, Can we figure something else out? So then I get involved and it's like, Well turn the chair around and put the blanket like this and then they're all excited that I'm getting involved. And then it gets really loud and I get upset.

Maggie (12:45.428)
Yeah.

Maggie (12:49.76)
My kids do that with

Maggie (12:55.476)
Yes.

Meara (13:00.982)
Yeah.

Maggie (13:01.476)
I I expect noise with children. I do. But I am very sensitive to I get over yes with loud noises. And my my body physically hurts if it's just it's it's nuts. But I've always been a more, you know, just a quiet person and

Meara (13:05.034)
I do too. Me too. Stimulated. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm.

Meara (13:22.43)
I used to

Maggie (13:26.676)
Use the what?

Meara (13:28.042)
I used to love kids being loud, but now that I've hit perimenopause because I used to be loud myself, but ever since perimenopause with all these hormones, I get frustrated really a lot easier and I notice that I do and so that's why I ha I have to take like extra time to realize calm down.

Maggie (13:30.887)
I never have.

Maggie (13:44.941)
Hey, you know, we'll need we'll need to do an episode on this because well we should do one on perimenopause. But we also need to do something on hyperthyroidism. Because I am finding that that is very common in women and it's and it makes motherhood especially extremely challenging. and I wonder

Meara (14:04.439)
With us.

Meara (14:11.179)
Mm-hmm.

Maggie (14:14.846)
I I thought I saved this video. I I followed this doctor and he was talking about it. but I I didn't save the video and now I can't find it of course. but talking about not having energy and

Meara (14:29.996)
Mm-hmm. Yep, it's all related.

Maggie (14:32.756)
And I and he was talking about all these other symptoms. I'm like, yeah, I I feel that. I feel all of those things. And now I'm wondering, man, and that's and it's something that I just I keep hearing more and more about. so we should definitely do an episode on that 'cause I think that could I think that's a big part of what we're talking about right now.

Meara (14:45.462)
Yeah, me too.

Meara (14:51.446)
And that also happens. It does. And that's also true in other countries as well, because a family member of my husband's just was diagnosed with that. So it's interesting. It's very interesting. But it's what

Maggie (15:05.514)
You know, it's s screens are screens are a big challenge, but I think they're a bigger challenge because of our health also, because we just physically aren't you know, and it's it's easier for us to rely on that sort of thing.

Meara (15:19.191)
Let it go.

Meara (15:27.244)
Well then we're not able to prepare for taking care of ourselves in the future. Nobody's thinking about how to take care of your body to prepare it for the future, to prepare it for perimenopause, to prepare it for menopause, to prepare for aftermenopause, you know? so yeah, that's definitely a discussion that needs to be had. But you know, the other day I was thinking that about how many memories for my childhood came from absolutely nothing. No devices at all. I didn't have one until I was out of out of high school, which is wild.

Maggie (15:35.978)
Yeah.

Maggie (15:50.099)
Mm-hmm.

Meara (15:55.831)
But you know, riding bikes, exploring and just making things up as we went. And I just wonder if we've accidentally convinced ourselves that, you know, kids need constant entertainment when all they really need is just that space to create imagination.

Maggie (15:57.558)
Mm-hmm.

Maggie (16:08.716)
They just need their childhoods back. You know?

Meara (16:11.99)
They do. Because boredom isn't the problem. That's the beginning of imagination and creativity, you know, where they solve problems as we discussed in our previous episode.

Maggie (16:15.148)
Yes.

And if you I'm not I'm not so sure how I I fully feel about Albert Einstein, but you know, he is the pinnacle of intelligence. And he always spoke on how imagination and creativity were were more important than, you know, book knowledge. or at least, you know, it's it's the beginning of

of what learning should be. And so many more people are and they've they've been talking about it for years, but it's becoming more and more impactful now, you know, of people discussing how, you know, children, you know, they need this. They need the boredom. They to use their imaginations and creativity and that makes them better learners and

You know, of course we heard that, you know, the school system was set up by Rockefellers to have workers, not, you know, inventors and you know, people that really thought for themselves. So

Meara (17:24.674)
Well hear me out. How many people actually sit and watch the sunset anymore? Or just sit outside without their phone and see like what's blooming in their yard or what bird is visiting their feeder because I'm obsessed with that. They are. And and it is it's it

Maggie (17:35.798)
They're watching other people do it on their phones.

Meara (17:42.155)
It's funny, but it's really not funny, you know. It's just like we're connected to everything and everyone all at the same same time, but we're becoming disconnected from the world that's just right there in front of us. And it's not about technology being evil because, you know, we have technology right now. This podcast exists because of technology, so that's not the issue. It just becomes the issue when we start replacing real life and conversations and family and being present in the moment. We do.

Maggie (17:52.82)
Yes.

Maggie (17:59.415)
Yes.

Maggie (18:06.644)
Yes. We need we need to be intentional and and smart about how we use AI.

Meara (18:11.958)
Pay attention.

Meara (18:19.68)
Yeah, and just start small, you know, and our family it again it's about rhythms and that that

connect us together because we are by no means perfect. But you know, we have family dinners. We may not all sit at the table because there's not enough room, but we're still there present with one another, or working outside together, or cleaning the house together, or I'm still working on it, cooking together, and reading, or simple conversations, because if we're not intentional with this, like you just said, then something else is always going to fill that space. And most of the time it's going to be a screen because that's all there is anymore in society.

Maggie (18:55.745)
Yeah.

Meara (18:57.49)
And I think one of the biggest hurdles that families are facing today isn't technology. It's about the attention, who gets our attention and what gets our attention and what kind of life is that creating, you know. where does it go? Usually followers.

Maggie (19:07.402)
Yes. Mm-hmm.

Maggie (19:17.204)
And who's and who's getting our energy? This is and this is a a rabbit hole that we won't get into. But these things were set up to get our energy. That is that is a real thing, you know. they're called, you know, there's people that do this too when they're called some kind of vampire. Do you know what I'm talking about? Not real vampires, like bloodthirsty vampires, but

Meara (19:23.594)
It's big one.

Meara (19:27.264)
Ha ha.

Maggie (19:46.368)
They're they're able to take your energy and you feel drained after being with them. It's a real thing. Back in the day, I I knew someone that was very it was I I can't even explain it. I can't even explain it. It was you know but later on in life I started, you know, hearing about this here and there and I'm like, wow, but it's true. There there are ways that you can like take people's energy away from them.

Meara (19:51.382)
I know people who take cheap.

Meara (20:00.067)
Raining.

Maggie (20:16.133)
And these devices are are doing that. You know.

Meara (20:20.672)
The evil eye I believe heavily in. sometimes when our kids get really sick, my husband will say, Someone gave the evil eye, you know, and it's it's crazy the things that that people can do. That's that's like you said, that's a whole nother discussion as well. And it's really not. It's really not. They're distracting us so they can take our energy.

Maggie (20:24.765)
Celebrities are doing this. Hollywood.

Maggie (20:35.839)
The world is not how we know it.

It's not we've been yes.

Yes.

Meara (20:49.024)
Yeah. Well, before we close today, we would like to leave you with this.

Your children probably won't remember the videos that they watched. They won't remember what was trending, and they won't remember most of what happened online, but they will remember the dinners with family, traditions, conversations, laughter, and how your home felt. Me too. Thank God it's not me. Look, she's emotional. In a world where everything is fighting for our attention, one of the greatest gifts we can give our family is presents.

Maggie (21:12.671)
That makes me emotional.

Meara (21:25.958)
gosh, I have got to stop with these endings. I mean, you know, but it's emotional for us. So put the phone down once in a while. Listen to the story. Take the walk. Watch the sunset. Because these ordinary moments become memories that last. Okay. Now, next week we will be talking about something I think almost every woman can relate to. Why we're so exhausted.

Maggie (21:27.057)
I know. I can't believe I'm joining you here.

Maggie (21:34.612)
It is.

Maggie (21:54.506)
Yes.

Meara (21:55.138)
We'll be talking about the nervous system overload, hormones, chronic stress, productivity culture, and why rest is not laziness. Until next time.

Maggie (22:03.327)
Hey, and let's add hyperthyroidism into that. That would work perfectly.

Meara (22:07.776)
Let's do it. I think it would. So until next time.

Maggie (22:13.58)
Stay rooted and stay wild.

Meara (22:16.053)
Stay wild.